The Truth or Just Another Music Inspired Scribbling?

In a sick enjoyment I lust over the pain others are feeling wishing, just wishing I could feel that same intolerable curse once again. Instead I sit here begging for something from this world of sin. I am sick of numbly existing for so long, I tell people I live but deep down I know I am wrong. I wait for this day to end and the next to begin but it seems as if it will never happen. I want out of this hell I have created and would rather be in yours, at least a change of pace to cure this on-coming insanity from planting more seeds in my far too fertile brain. I want to be held by the cold arms of a new misery since an old warmth will never fill me again. I guess all I ask is to save me, even if it is just a different ring of hell, let things change and give me something to get away…